OPERATION: Smack Down
by SEXYCANDYCORNSTAR
Summary: During the battle on the planet Korthal, an ONI agent was suddenly sent to a universe where devils exist and supernatural incidents are an everyday norm and worst of all, meeting his perverted parallel counter-part which looks like him but shares nothing like poor ONI operative Ichiko Uni. [I DON'T OWN HALO OR HSDXD]. (I am a new writer so go easy on me) I
1. Chapter 1

PILOT/HALO/ANI(HDXD)

The only thing that goes through Ichiko's mind during any drop mission onto a planet's surface would be who or what to aim first, but obviously the big and ugly "Covie's" has to be shot dead first before he could start thinking of scaring little grunt's out of their simple minds. But before he could dwell any further into it.

"HEY, ICH !" screamed his Captain.

"Yeah, what?" said Ichiko, while he held his helmet in his left hand and the ANR-3 by his right.

Turning his head lazily towards his NCO with the most blank as fuck facial expression which somewhat annoys his superior, but his NCO was by now, used to seeing him react like that.

"You seem to be deep in thought, what is it this time?"

"Well, thinking up new ways to kill them that's all. Why? Getting soft on me cap?" Ichiko joked.

"Nah, just thought you were trying to think up new ways to masturbate without using hands." the NCO counter joked.

"And for the millionth time its, CAPTAIN HAGGARD TO YOU!" Haggard yelled in a playful manner.

"Yes, sir" said Icihko while giving Haggard a mocking salute.

"Huh, damned spook" Haggard said, while giving Icihko a friendly smile.

"Anyway, it's time to head down to our assign drop pods and, Oh! By the way, if you were paying ANY attention to the mission briefing, it's going to be "Hot" really "Hot" planet side." said Haggard while patting Ichiko on the head, and quickly jogged his way out of the armoury.

"humph" Ichiko puffed.

"Nothing particularly new" whispered Ichiko.

"Feet first into hell".

"Heh, I love my job" smiled Ichiko.

It's the year 2559.

The Neo-Covenant has joined the UNSC, as more of an "AGGRESSIVE ally" towards any opponent within or outside UNSC space. Under the powerful and watchful eyes of the Arbiter, to insure any thoughts of rebellion among his own kin are immediately put down with extreme prejudice. The reason for this is quite simple really. The Sangheili had done many acts of barbarity towards the humans, during the Human-Covenant war, under the "holy" guidance of the Prophets. This has lead to many Sangheili's to suicide or the "less retarded" to do what they're good at. Fighting under the UNSC banner until their sins has washed away in 'holy combat'.

ANR-3 or Auto-Nanite Rifle: The rifle is design to give the infantry the ability to fire both .45 and .70 calibre rounds by using the Nanites in the barrel to widen or shrink the diameter of the barrel, and can be controlled by a touch screen interface located below the camera sights in the back of the weapon's stock.

CHAPTER 1

RADIO\\..\\

12th Infantry platoon: \\ ALL UNITS, FALL BACK!\\

23rd Cadiack Cavalry: \\THIS IS 23rd. WE LOST THREE SCORPIONS AND TEN MORE ARE FUCKED BEYOND USE. WE CAN'T GET TO YOU. YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN!\\

43rd Fireteam: \\NEGETIVE, THAT IS A NO GO I REPEAT. THAT IS.(BOOOOMMM!)..(STATIC)...\\

Ichiko was paying careful attention to the UNSC battle-net, and its worst than ugly it's a complete shit storm with a dash cluster fuck down there. Ichiko quickly 'switched from wide-com to company-com' and focused on hologram being projected by the holo-emitter which his team has formed a "school circle" around.

Then in a small flash an A.I appeared next to the planet that's being projected, and it quietly looked at the ODST team assembled around it. The AI looked around and asses each ODST member while looking through they're past history in its infinite archive banks. "Huh, this must be the new Delta drop team, Hmmmmmm. I wonder if they will survive on their first Jump". The AI thought, and then it switched its attention to the last ODST member that's resting by the corner of the room a few meters away from the holo-emitter.

He was dressed in Jet black ODST armour, while the rest of his team has a grey coloured under suit and all the hard ceramic pieces are dark blue in colour. But his suit and visor is as dark as the void of space, but except for the demon like mouth coloured around the visor like some kind of massive mouth with rows of sharp teeth around the visor. Then finally, the ONI emblem resting on the right side of his jet black ceramic chest plating and below the words "THE DEVILS ADVOCATE".

'Hmmm, I guess his going to be my care taker' the AI thought.


	2. Chapter 2

WORST AI IN UNSC HISTORY.

"Let me introduce myself. I am Lucy, serial number 479304" the Ai said.

The ODST all just stared at her, until one of them decided to ask a question.

"So...Lucy, whats the situation planet side" the female member asked.

"Well it's, for the luck of better words a nightmare. But that's why you guys were called in" said the AI sadistically.

"What do we know about the planets ecosystem?" said the other ODST member

"The planet has a similar ecosystem to that of Harvest. But don't worry too much, because very few of you scrubs are not going to live long enough to need that info." replied the AI

The rest of the team were shocked at that reply except for the ONI agent who seems to know that the AI is 100% made to be loyal to ONI and ONI only. This means his going to have that thing in his suit, which made his skin crawl.

"Fucking great. I am going to have that thing with me or in me in this mission" thought the ONI agent.

"HEY! Tall, dark and probably handsome, plug me in. Because i am assign to you" said the AI with a dark smile.

Ichiko just stared at the hologram AI for a few seconds until he stood up and calmly walked up to the holo-emitter and then placed his chip he had in his pouch into one of the slots in the emitter. In a flash the AI disappeared. "Your suits pretty cramped. But i can get used to it hehe" said the AI in a seducing tone".

Ichiko kept silent until he turned towards his team and said "we're dropping in eight mikes, so get your shit straight and tampons tight" ordered Ichiko.

"YES,SIR!"

Ichiko and the rest of the ODST team moved towards the drop bay located at the bowl of the frigate. The team quickly set them self's in their drop pods, then in unison all the blast doors for the pods closed, and a loud "SHHHHH" echoed around the drop bay. Ichiko checked each pod for any abnormalities before pressing on towards his pod. His pod is a little bigger than the normal pods as its specially made for ONI agents and Spartans, because its design to have a Mongoose MK4 attached to the back of the pod and its own blast door to protect it from re-entry. Ichiko set his weapon first then set himself comfortably in the pod.

"SOOOOOOOO, are you normally this silent or do you not like me?" the AI chirped.

" Of all the AI's I could be assign to. I get the one that won't shut the fuck up" Ichiko shot

"I can fuck up your mission if you want?" said Lucy in a child like manner.

As Ichiko's drop pod door closed shut. The drop bay started to decompressed and then the doors under the pods opened to reveal the planet's surface. Then every pod in the bay was shot out, heading for the planets surface.


	3. Chapter 3

People die every day, so what does it matter if another

seven dies in your hands ?

ICHIKO'S LOADOUT

-ANR-3 shoots a .45 explosive or a stealth subsonic (SMG) rounds but the .70 has two variants within the same bullet or shell, heavy duty AP (SABOT) round and a new bullet known as Hellfire rounds which can be altered on the command interface above the weapons stock.

-5 Mastermind grenades switchable from frags, smart or smoke.

-5 dumb plasma grenades.

-2 twelve mm DSA M9 (Pistol)

-1 energy sword.

-2 SILENT SMG'S with .45 subsonic rounds.

-RHD(Experimental Rhino Heavy Duty) ODST BDU(able to take on direct plasma hits four times on the same spot before faulting.

Ichiko's drop pod entered the planet's atmosphere and started to shake violently, but this is expected because the drop pod is slightly larger than the average SOEIV and will cause slight turbulence to the occupant inside.

"I'm getting lots of radio chatter from UNSC ground troops. It's BAD" said the AI.

"All i need to know is whether the package's ready for pick up?" asked Ichiko.

"Yeah, it's ready" answered the AI.

Within seconds of breaking through the planet's atmosphere, the drop pod crashed violently and had the base breach into the earth below, but not to the point where it covers the blast doors. After a few seconds the blast doors internal pressurize air tanks were released into strategic points around the door allowing it to be launched a few feet forward.

Ichiko jumped out his pod and aimed his rifle to his front and both his sides making sure the area was clear. After making sure the coast was clear, He relaxed himself and secures his weapon to his magnetic clamps on his back.

"Package is four clicks North West." Said the AI

"Location of my team?" Asked Ichiko

"Surviving members are engaged and the rest didn't make it, Capitan" answered Lucy ending the final word with a French like accent.

"Possibility of assisting my team?" asked Ichiko

"Listen, the insurrectionist knows what's in that lab, and you want to waste time saving scrubs? " replied Lucy with an aggravated tone.

"I don't want to tell you how to do your job but I say fuck those scrubs and get to the objective, Agreed?" Lucy continued.

"Agreed" said Ichiko without a hint of emotion.

Ichiko then proceeded to go around the drop pod and locate the "vehicle release" button which is located on the back lower corner of the pod. After Ichiko has located the button, he proceeded to unhook the safety hatch then access the button. A few second later the blast shield for the mongoose mark 2 launched ten feet forwards, smashing into a tree.

After getting the vehicle mobile, Ichiko then looked at his arm mounted computer to access the satellite in orbit to locate the nearest path to the objective. "You know i can do that all for you" said the AI with a hint of disapproval.

"I forgot i have you along for this ride, fine tell me where's the nearest path." Said Ichiko

"Like i said before its Northwest of here" said the annoyed AI.

By the blowout scorpion tank was one of Ichiko's insertion team taking on heavy fire from multiple directions. He used his helmet cam to peak on the opposite side of the tank to locate where the fire was coming from, but every time he did that, the insurrectionist would blast the spot where he was trying to peak from. "GOD DAMMIT" screamed the young private. He returned fire as soon as he had the chance spraying his MA5C at the general direction of the insurrectionist.

"I hope that spook knows what his doing by leaving me here" said the private.

But as the ODST was hammering away at the enemy with his rifle, he did not realize that the insurrectionist had launched two salvos of mortar shells at him. BOOM...BOOM! And the private was on his back with a missing right arm and left leg, breathing his last breath of air before blacking out from blood lost.

Ichiko was only five hundred meters away from the lab which was in a forest ten kilometres away from the capital city. The area around the lab is a warzone with the UNSC planet defence force on the defensive and the Insurrectionist bashing through. Ichiko held his position on a ridge overlooking the battle below and from his prospective the battle isn't going well for the UNSC, well not here that is. "well these guys aren't going to last long, better get down there and retrieve the package before the insurrectionist break through" said the AI.

" Right" said Ichiko

Ichiko moved stealthily towards the lab (which was disguise as a pharmacy centre) by moving over the dead bodies and makeshift defensive position. Ichiko's BDU has a build in light deflector panels all around the armour which turns him invisible for thirty minutes and will recharge once he stay's still. The battle around him was chaotic at best and having nearly hit by a stray bullet that will reveal his position to both sides. "Jesus , cutting it a little close there Ich" the AI warned.

Ichiko then started to sprint towards the entrance of the lab and jumped over another makeshift sandbag defensive position but almost kneeing a marine turning to reload his assault rifle.

"alright have the second and fifth retreat back into the building, the rest hold the outer perimeter of the area. Give us time to organize a kill zone in here." Ordered the captain into his mic.

"where the fucks the ODST reinforcements" the captain said to himself.

"here"

"WHAT THE FUCK" screamed the captain in shock?

"Echo,Bravo,Echo 4356" said Ichiko

"That's the challenging pass." said captain

"Okay, i am not going to lie to you son but we're going to be over run soon" said the captain while jogging along with Ichiko to the entrance of the building

"i know" said Ichiko stripped of emotion.

As the captain walked pass the entrance doors and the six marines building the barricade in a hurry. Ichiko stopped right behind the captain.

"Captain, nothing personal" said Ichiko while putting a bullet into the captain's head and quickly shooting all six marines that were putting up the barricade behind him.

"What a waste, i was starting to like that guy. What was his name again." said the AI with a sadistic s tone.

" not funny, Lucy" said Ichiko with a hint of sadness

"Whatever, people die every day so what does it matter if seven more dies in your hands"

Ichiko just kept quiet and proceeded to the hidden elevator behind the counter.

Ichiko went over to a hidden access port and plugged his AI in to the port to activate the hidden elevator doors."Done" said the AI the doors to the elevator opened behind him, and Ichiko slowly stepped into it. The doors closed shut behind and slowly descended down, but the sudden rumbling in the elevator is the only reminder that there is still a battle raging on outside.


End file.
